Love is always love

Pro-love marriage people cite that arrange-marriage although tenable, the disturbance and dissent among couples continue. Pro-arranged marriage community always point the rate of divorce among love marriages. I always think that marriage is a compromise. One need a life partner for sure. A perfect or successful marriage is where both couples adjust themselves to suit each other.

We also get married with the consent of our parents and long lost relatives who bestow upon us the courtesy of finding us a ‘suitable match’ when we reach the marriageable age. The least we can almost always trust our parents with is to do research the ‘groom’ at a CBI probe level and look deep into his family, moral values, lifestyle etc. But this relevant information comes paired with astrological predictions and all sorts of hearsay adding a few other stages of compatibility checks.

As I put more and more thought into it, I realize the question of one vs. other seems like an unending debate with both sides having valid points. The way to go for me seems to be a compromise between the two. In India arranged marriages originated when child marriages was customary in the country. Caste system gave birth to arranged marriages, as the upper caste families didn’t want their children to marry outside their community and caste.

People still debate on the issue, which one is better. What should be the basis of the marriage love or social norms? We are still confused about these issues. Education and media played a vital role in changing the perception of the Indian mind. Same in case of arranged marriage where the relation starts only after the girl or boy likes each other. But there are certain things, which are found in love marriages and not in arranged.

Before deciding anything the parents check the family background and financial stability which is also very important. It is argued that love marriages offer more independence and freedom as compared to arranged marriages since both of them know each other, so the social pressure and family pressure is less.